listen to me
your heart is still beating
you still have air in your lungs
and you still have a shot
do not give up
I’m sorry I can’t come to the phone right now. I’m busy cutting open Fruit Gushers and squeezing all of the goo into a glass so I can take a shot of it because that has always been a dream of mine and now that I’m an adult with a job, I finally have the means to make it a reality. Please leave your name and number after the beep.
The girl who was my elementary school girl friend just got engaged and I’m sitting here single wearing a pug shirt and hamburger underwear
Just remember, u r someone’s dream girl
I’m a boy
Omg baby thank you!!!!
My mom was beating the shit out of my puppy and I ran in and hit her then we got into a fight and she locked me in my room and said “you stupid fucking bitch. Talk to me again and I will kick your dumb ass out. You need to learn to shut the fuck up. Its just a dog”
Lovely. Now I cant eat today